HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

"Nineteen-fu*kin-eighty!" - Julianne Moore, "Boogie Nights" (I watched the new year's party scene yesterday because it's a great scene and it was in my head.)

Several bloggers whom I'm friends with have looked over the past year or written their resolutions in their blogs. My resolutions are pretty mundane (not gain 10 pounds on black-and-white cookies again, etc.) and will stay in my journal. But I will say I'm grateful for all the friends I've made or become better friends with in the past year (like S. and V.) and all of you folks who actually read my blog. So thanks!

On New Year's Eve 1992, I had just graduated from college in Phila a semester early and had no clue what to do. I was an English major and had fulfilled all the requirements and was pretty darn tired of school, and I wanted to save a little money and get a head start on life, so I graduated. But then suddenly I had no direction. It was a recession and I had no job, and I didn't know whether to stay in Phila and look or try to plunk down my meager savings for a pricey apt in NY.

Even though I had technically graduated, I stayed in my dorm for lack of anything else to do. (I always found someone to sign me in as a guest, or sometimes I'd just look at the security person, and when my card wouldn't work, they'd say, "Huh? I know you live here" and let me in).

On New Year's Eve, I was wandering around campus alone, as everyone else home for winter break. I decided to go see "Home Alone 2" by myself. Walking west to the theater, I passed a homelesss woman on the Walk who was always selling paintings to support herself. I had vowed before that if I ever had actual extra money, I'd give her some. Now I had a little extra, so I gave her two bucks. She gave me a photocopy of a painting of a dove.

I saw "Home Alone 2," and a dove was a central theme. I considered it a sign that I should be grateful for what I had. I came back to my dormroom, taped up the dove as a reminder, took the elevator up to the rooftop lounge and watched some fireworks. The only other people up there were a couple. After that, I went to my room and wrote in my journal for a while. I didn't know where I would go next, but I knew I was lucky anyway.

The prospect of giving myself a little more time on campus, to actually enjoy it without taking classes, was tempting. In the end, that's what I did. A friend of mine knew of a temp job, and that temp job turned into a part-time job for the next four months. I got more involved in school activities because I could do them without coursework. And I spent a lot of time in the computer room writing resumes and cover letters.

Even though it was a very confusing period in my life, I tried to remind myself how lucky I was. And yesterday, I talked to my father, and he said we're all lucky we live in this part of the country where we don't have tsunamis. He tries to remember how lucky he is, too. So enterting the new year, I am grateful for all I have. I hope everyone has a fortunate new year.