What will they say?

I just read this article:

"Walter Breuning learned to read by kerosene lantern, remembers his grandfather telling him about fighting in the Civil War, and cast his first presidential ballot for Woodrow Wilson. The 112-year-old resident of Great Falls, Mont., apparently became the world's oldest man when 113-year-old Henry Allingham of England died Saturday. Breuning was born Sept. 21, 1896."

What will they say about me?

"Caren M------ learned to type on a gray Smith-Corona typewriter, cast her first ballot for President Bill Clinton, and remembered her grandfather telling her about playing tennis in Florida. The 150-year-old resident of New Jersey apparently became the world's oldest living person when 189-year-old actress Elizabeth Taylor passed away. A cradle-robber from the get-go, she is older than her 145-year-old husband..." Ha ha ha